I am really bad at negative self-talk. Or, maybe I’m really good at it? Now I’ve confused myself. I’m an expert at talking negatively about myself. What I realized this weekend, however, was that sometimes all you can do is believe in yourself just a little bit more than you have before.
On Saturday, I did my first (and mostly likely only) 1/2 marathon. A dear friend convinced me to sign up. I did. And then winter was hard and we didn’t train like we should and suddenly it was April. And my April tried to kill me. So, I didn’t go into the weekend feeling prepared at all. Instead, I went into it with a little bit of dread. I wasn’t sure what to expect. I knew I wouldn’t hit the goals I had set for myself when I first signed up. I knew I wouldn’t get the time I wanted. I knew we wouldn’t move as fast as we should have. I knew it would be one of the hardest things I had ever done.
It turns out I was right on all accounts.
What does this have to do with my Make a Difference Monday posts, you ask? Well, here’s the thing I also learned this weekend – at about mile 9 when all I wanted to do was give up:
I cannot make a difference in the world if I don’t believe in myself.
I cannot continue to try to inspire people to be the change and light in their worlds when I do not believe I can be the same in mine.
I cannot encourage those I love while silently discouraging myself.
The negative words I speak to myself about myself have to stop. There is a lot to change in my world. There is a lot that I would like to change about myself. There is a lot that needs to change. But I have to stop talking about myself in ways that I would never talk about other people. I need to learn to see myself through the eyes of the people who don’t see my flaws first. I need to love myself. And by loving myself I can better love my world.
So, that’s how I want you to make a difference this week. Every time you think about saying something negative about yourself, stop. See yourself like the people who love you see you. See yourself like God sees you. Be brave! Be strong! Be vulnerable! Believe!
Do you need help getting rid of your negative self-talk? Check out The Gift of Imperfection by Brene Brown. It requires a lot of honesty on your part to do it well. But it’s so worth it.
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